Better Receive Negative Feedback: Manager Guide

How to Better Receive Negative Feedback
Most managers are trained to give performance feedback. Far fewer are skilled at receiving it — especially when that feedback feels uncomfortable, critical, or unfair. Yet the ability to better receive negative feedback with composure and curiosity is just as essential to sustained leadership effectiveness as delivering it well.

In our organizational culture assessments, employees consistently report that too many leaders dismiss, discount, or take offense at feedback that challenges their self-image. Even more damaging, upward feedback is often acknowledged and then quietly ignored. When people see that speaking up leads nowhere — or worse, carries personal risk — trust erodes quickly. Commitment follows it out the door.

Leaders who truly want to build a high performance culture must model what they expect from others:

• Openness
• Accountability
• A genuine willingness to learn

How you respond in the moment of criticism sends a powerful signal about psychological team safety, credibility, and whether feedback in your organization is performative or real.

A Big Feedback Mistake
Reacting defensively to negative feedback is a costly leadership error. When leaders bristle, explain away the input, or shut it down entirely, they model exactly the opposite of what they expect from their teams. The message is clear — feedback is acceptable in theory, but not in practice.

Even worse, defensive reactions squander a rare opportunity. Candid feedback offers insight into how a leader’s behavior is actually experienced, not how it was intended. That gap between intent and impact is where real learning lives. When leaders lean into the discomfort instead of resisting it, they create space for a productive dialogue, strengthen trust, and surface issues that would otherwise remain unspoken — often until they show up as disengagement, reduced performance, or attrition.

Six Tips on How to Better Receive Negative Feedback

1. Assume Good Intentions
   Start by presuming the feedback was offered to help you become a more effective leader. That assumption alone lowers defensiveness and opens the door to learning. Treat the input as data — imperfect, possibly incomplete, but valuable.
2. Be Appreciative
   Say “thank you,” and mean it. Giving upward feedback takes courage. The person speaking up is risking discomfort, misinterpretation, or retaliation. A simple expression of appreciation signals maturity and reinforces that candor is safe.
3. Seek Clarity
   Vague feedback is easy to dismiss and impossible to act on. Ask follow-up questions that surface specifics. What behaviors were observed? When did they occur? In what situations? A comment like “you don’t seem to care about how hard we work” is not actionable on its own. Understanding the moments, context, and perceived impact is what turns criticism into insight.
4. Buy Time If You Need It
   If the feedback catches you off guard, don’t force an immediate response. It is reasonable to ask for time to reflect. Just be explicit about next steps — commit to a follow-up conversation and put it on the calendar. Reflection without closure erodes credibility.
5. Expand the Conversation
   Look beyond the surface issue. Sometimes feedback is a symptom, not the root cause. There may be lingering frustration, a perceived slight, role ambiguity, or broader dissatisfaction with how the team is being led. Exploring these dynamics respectfully can uncover systemic issues that matter far more than a single comment.
6. Ask for Support
   If the feedback is valid and your behavior is undermining the team, own it — and ask for help. Invite specific, real-time examples when the behavior shows up. Set clear expectations for change and schedule a check-in to review progress. Nothing builds trust faster than visible follow-through and a sincere commitment to getting better.

The Bottom Line

If you cannot receive negative feedback with openness and discipline, you forfeit the right to expect your team to do so. New managers, in particular, are always under the microscope — how you handle criticism quickly becomes the standard others follow. Performance improvement is not a one-way street. The same rigor, humility, and dependability you demand from your team must apply to you as well.

To learn more about how to better receive negative feedback, download 8 Reasons Why Leaders Need 360 Feedback

by Tristam Brown: CEO

Tristam Brown is an executive business consultant and organizational development expert with more than three decades of experience helping organizations accelerate performance, build high-impact teams, and turn strategy into execution. As CEO of LSA Global, he works with leaders to get and stay aligned™ through research-backed strategy, culture, and talent solutions that produce measurable, business-critical results. See full bio.